dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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