I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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