He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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