It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
