let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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