One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
