3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
operation have a gay friend backfired
Farmville is her only friend.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
