great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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