Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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