Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Help. Why am I so naked?
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