Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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