yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
