I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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