I want to have your abortion
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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