We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Randomize
