im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize