Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
