I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
thus making me awesome and them whores
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
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