A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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