Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
