actually, I'm a sock model
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize