Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
