i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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