he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
