it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
You're a waste of cheezeits
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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