just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize