summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
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