It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
