how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Let's paint friendship bongs
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
COCAINE IS GR8
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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