I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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