The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
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