I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
