the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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