Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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