Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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