Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
