A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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