So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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