your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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