Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
