I wish I could teleport
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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