I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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