Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
These tits shall not be calmed
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
