are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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