bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Randomize
