All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize