If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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