I wish I only lived at night.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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