Three words: puerto rican gang bang
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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