the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
